10/23/11

10/23/11

Holy crap.  What a night.  *sigh* Jess, and Erica, Austin, and myself went to Old Key Lime House.  First, Jess didn't have her ID and then we found out neither did Erica.  But we searched Jessica's car, found hers and went back.  Erica couldn't drink, and they asked her how she even got in the door so she took it personally and got mad, then left.  She sat in her car for a while, texting me so I had to deal with that. Finally I had to go get Jessica's car and drive it back to OKL so Erica could go meet up with this guy she'd met and made out with.  (actually, she met him a while back but nothing ever happened with them til Friday but that's a whole new story).  Anyway, so she left and I became the designated driver.
Austin was fine but the cops may not have thought so.  Jess had two beers and 15 lemon drops.  15!!!!!!  I should never have let her drink so much but I wasn't really keeping track and she was fine until we left.  We made it to Shea's and she started vomiting in the car with a blanket she found.  So I started dry heaving until *I* threw up (because I really can't take puke.  Anything but puke!) a little.  I parked funny, ran in and got some stuff for Jess, and let her pass out. I should have just taken her home to begin with.  I only got to sing one song and spent maybe 15 minutes at Shea's lol, cuz Jess made me take her home.  Poor Austin had to take her up to her apartment and then we had to wait for Erica to come get us.  After that, Austin and I had started kissing, and he came back up to my room.  We didn't have sex because I'm on my period (finally!) and we had no condom.  But we sure did get close to sex.  I told him I wasn't sure about dating him again but I was definitely down for some sex. So, we'll see.  today, I have to share my personal story in that NAMI class.  Yikes!  Other than that, nothing going on.  Austin is still here, lol.  Playing games on my computer!  And I've been coughing--as usual.  =(.
{okay I don't mean to sound like a PSA or anything but if you're coughing and you don't even know what you have, shouldn't you refrain from swapping bodily fluids with someone else??  IJS}
Well, Austin and I took Jess her keys then went to breakfast...
I'm not sure what's going to happen.  I feel like he's so good but ugh still not who I should be with because of our areas of life.  I'm ready to stop running away from good men and find one I can marry and have kids with.  Austin is only 22.  I doubt he's even close to that place.  Still, he's a good kisser lol.  So, anyway, went to my class and read my story.  I also added about my rapes and molestations cause for whatever reason I didn't type that part in.  I started crying through it.  I really didn't think I was going to cry, Rita.  It shocked me to cry and read even that snipped out loud.  I guess putting it out there, rereading it and saying it out loud was an emotional thing but damn. {therapists would call this a breakthrough, my dear.} So, yeah.  After that, we listened to music.  It was a beautiful piece of music (I'll ask next week what it was) that had a calming effect.  It reminded me of a dance -- a ballet.  The point was to not think just let the music envelope us.  I loved it.  Class was over (short today) and we took that Gisselle girl home.  (She's the girl I didn't like but I was determined to like her.) When we got home, I was so exhausted I napped for about three hours.  Then my dad and I went to the store and got dinner, so you're all up to date.  Tomorrow I have to work on my bible study and I think I'll reorganize my room.  Seems like a good time to get that done.  So, I found out that next week when Adam's anniversary of his passing comes, all those people who hate me now because I'm such a drama queen, are having a cookout for him.  I wasn't even invited.  I mean, how shitty in my opinion.  I was one of his closest friends.  I'll do something myself I suppose. Oh, huh.  I guess Erin wasn't invited either.  WTF.  I feel like Adam would be very bothered by that.  Whatever.  I can't believe they wouldn't invite the people closest to him.  Nicole and Justin would never have even known him if it wasn't for us.  I mean maybe they would have and maybe I shouldn't be so upset?  I guess it is what it is, and we'll do something ourselves!  Man, dinner was so good.  I had steak and a baked potato.  Nom, nom, nom.  Now this "new guy" Erica's been talking to is here and we're going to watch a movie.  I may go to bed, I don't know.  I'd rather get some of this done and read to send.  :).  Oh, Dave ("new" guy for Erica) might be Hugh Hefner for Halloween because I'm a playboy playmate and Erica is "sex  kitten" er sassy cat whatever.  Are you dressing up? If so, as what?  :) I can't wait to get the new nb started, omg.  It's going to be great.  Erica is going to turn the internet back on in her name so that will help.  I can write in my LJ again, do my RPG, ahhh marvelous, marvelous!  I just need a job and a driver's license.  Ooooh also.  I was thinking of moving to Orlando at some point and starting a business w/ my friends Michelle and Ryan.  It would be a karaoke business and we'd do weddings and events and stuff like that. Could be cool, plus I could look after my grandmother.  I guess we'll see, yea?  Erica and Dave are watching Shutter.  Good movie.  I have 5 more pages to write plus your letter.  I think what I'll do is share some quotes from my GRACE book that really touched my heart.  So here it goes!  Enjoy!  :)