2:33pm
Hey Chels,
I can't believe it's been a full week since I've spent time with B, but I've been to his place often enough. Last night he asked me if I could walk Killer for him so I did, he was just leaving Chicago when I woke up this morning at like 10:30am.
Actually, there is something I've been meaning to write about but I keep forgetting (usually when there's a lot going on at once I tend to write until I can't anymore, no matter if I've written everything I need to get out or not. But I do write everyday so eventually everything will come out, much like now).
So, my friend Steve is in St Louis on business and he really wanted me to come down there but it's 5 hours one way. I seriously thought about it, though. I don't know if I've ever told you about him but we met each other online in 2001. He lives in Virginia. We liked each other but only "dated" for a month. He found Ashley (the girl he's married to now) and I found Nick, Mike, Brian, AND Ryan. He's never been to Chicago or in Illinois so the fact that he's here now (or just across the border) is a very big deal. He even told me that he'd be respectful of my budding relationship with B because he doesn't want to mess anything up. Meaning, if I did go down there he wouldn't be trying to have sex with me because he knows I am into someone else right now. We have talked before about being together and he was gonna come here to live. But, he is married (to Ashley) and he needs to take care of that first. What I mean by THAT is that I don't want to be the reason why he leaves her. If he really did love me and want to be with me, I think that would have already happened.
Even though I've known Steve a LOT longer than B, I don't even think that I could go through with sleeping with someone while having feelings for someone else. I think B would have understood, but I wouldn't. I dunno how people do that, just sleep with whoever.
Anywho, I told B that I was saving Saturday for him. He seemed to like that :P. I might even stay the night. I haven't decided yet. I just miss him a lot, ever since that stupid fire I have only seen him for 2 minutes to get his key so I could walk Killer for him. His sleep is getting messed up too, no bueno!
So, my springtime inspiration play list has grown from 291 to? 434. That's more than 50, maybe 75 more than my winter bliss. Oh, and I finally put in some Alicia Keys! Take that, asshole.
You know what? I am slowly learning that one sex isn't better or worse than the other one, there is good and bad in everyone. There are some guys that are just the nicest, sweetest guys around. And other guys that are just hell on earth. Not raised right, don't know how to be men, lie, steal, cheat, hit, you name it. And then there are women who really have your back, you can talk to about anything, and who will be your soul sister. Then there are the women who give females everywhere a bad name. Stealing boyfriends/husbands, getting pregnant on purpose, causing drama everywhere they go. I have learned that gender is not as important as who they are inside.
Ugh stupid Mike Tyson! Sorry, random..
Oh, I do have a rant before I go, Miley Cyrus. Now, I don't particularly like her. She is a little annoying. BUT! I will say this. She is not as bad as the tabloids are making her out to be. She is an 18 year old girl who is very slender and an entertainer. Also, she's not "forgetting" to put her underpants on and bending over. She's a little like Hilary Duff and I think she will be fine. I do think everyone needs to chill. What really pisses me off is that fame is so confusing. These young people are getting mixed signals left and right about what's acceptable. That and a lot of people see children as money makers and by the time they're legal they're exhausted. All the tabloids are doing are using others for their own personal gain.
If there's a movie coming out or someone did something really awesome and noteworthy--that I want to hear. I do not want to see: Jack Nichelson's man boobs, Jennifer Love Hewitt picking a wedgie, Selma Blair picking up dog poop, or Nicole Ritchie attempting to cross the street. I don't give a shit about the rest of it.
Phew, I am getting exhausted. I can't wait to write poetry with you tonight!
Love,
Me
4:05pm
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