11/4/11
Well. I'm not off to a great start this morning. I think I got 5 hours of sleep tops and I woke up because I had a dream about a spider that kept jumping on me. It was black and red and I kept flinging it away only to have it return. Stupid spider. THEN I get this text message from Nicole: Justin and I are going to do some mad lines at lunch time! BYOC (bring your own coke) who's in?!! :/ So, I called her to ask if there was a reason she needed to send that and she just said she heard lots of rumors flying around and people talking shit so *I* must have told more than just Erica and I should get my facts straight, it was her making a joke instead of getting mad so *I* shouldn't make such a big spectacle about it. I told her she wasn't as mature as she thought she was and she said "I never said I was mature". Then she hung up on me. Erica got {erica got what??}
She's nothing but a big piece of drug shit and I want nothing to do with her. I'm so upset because people always assume I'm the drama queen and it's just bullshit. Sometimes I really hate South Florida. Leanne is having a baby shower and I promised I'd go and now I don't know. Nicole is not someone I really want to be around right now. I've tried to be civil, I even stuck up for her when Erica flipped her shit. What I don't get is why it's ok for her to run HER mouth but no one else. Ya know? Really, who died and made her queen of what's right and wrong?
Dumb blond bitch. *sigh*. I'm changing my number today and I'm not giving it out anymore. I just need to really decide who I should have in my life and who I shouldn't. So fucking sad. I also need to start acting more Christianly, or wait-- more Christlike which means praying for these lost people and killing them with kindness. I don't know who to keep in my life anymore and who not to. I am such a mess. Who can I trust, Rita? {no one in south florida, that is for damn sure!} I feel like I'm right back in high school. It's so frustrating. *deep breath* Okay. I'm going to use the last 6 pages of this nb to be a positive person. I can be mature. I can be positive. I can have a healthy outlook on life. I can achieve happiness. I can be like Christ and pray for people who make bad choices. I can make better choices for myself. I can be civil towards people even when they choose otherwise. I can choose to have a GREAT DAY and enjoy the beautiful weather. I can be a person I love, value, and cherish. Ahhh nice clean floors. It should stay that way for another 30 seconds lol. I'm gonna finish writing, change and send all this out to you today *squee* I'm watching Days of our Lives, annoyed because they're messing with Sami's relationship again. Boooo! I like her with Rafe dangit. They make a great couple. I loved her with Lucas but they ruined it with all the EJ dimera bull. Now, they've redeemed themselves with Rafe and they wanna screw it all up again with a Sami/Austin/Carrie/Rafe mix up? GGGGRRRR!!!!!!!!! That's what I say, grrr!
Anyway, so tonight is Skeeter's and I'm gonna try "My Immortal" by Evanescence, "always be my baby" and "without you" by Mariah Carey. I can do it! I know I can! People seem to like when I do country though so I should think of some country songs. Maybe a little Reba McIntyre? Shania Twain? Deena Carter? I could do some Lady Antebellum but I don't know. I do wish they had "can't take my eyes off you" and "I was here" by LA. I wish I could sing more like Kelly Pickler style, or that I knew more Miranda Lambert songs than just Kerosene, Gunpowder and Lead, and White Liar. Oh, and ugh I forget what the other is called... um oh! The House That Built Me. I could try Only Prettier. Then there's Giddy On UP by Laura Bell Bundy... and I wish I could do more Leanna Rimes. I can sing "you light up my life" but when I get nervous I mess up. I can do it though! I know I can! So, I have a lot of choices for tonight let's hope I freakin' remember and don't chicken out. hehe. I will use the new NB to give you all the details. Well, it's 2pm and SO freaking gorgeous out. I just love it. I hope it stays that way for a big. Hmmm...
~I can live
I can laugh
and I can love
I can sing for joy
I can dance like no one's watching
I can reach for the stars
and run in the sand
letting it tickle my toes
I can open my heart
I can let it beat at love's embrace
I can smile at a stranger
and at my reflection, too
I can live
I can laugh
and I can love.~
I think it's a cute poem. I just needed to write something lol. Anyway, so Kayla got a haircut and it's so damn short but it had to be because her fur was so deeply matted. I do brush her but it's hard maintaining a maltese! She looks good, it's just going to take some getting used to. She feels better which is the important part. Now, if only I could get her to stop barking all the dang time. LOL. It gets so aggravating. I mean she's better but... still. Oh! Rory made me food! And it's nommies. He fried chicken fingers for us. Kinda needs more flavor in my opinion but oh well. Actually they aren't as flavorless as I originally thought. Hmm. I dunno. Anyway, the dogs are going bonkers over people walking by. Waht the heck? Calm down! u turn doesn't like black people, Kayla is afraid of her own shadow, and Tobi just barks hoping his daddy is home lol. Crazy animals. :) OOh look I made it to the last page. AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!! Thank you for enduring my crazy nb. The next one will truly be amazing. I love you.
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