2007
Hey~
I love waking up and watching Ellen! She's the best! Man, today is 9/11 anniversary. Where were you on 9/11 and how did you first find out? I'm going to think of this as like, another trip down memory lane, to add to your questions you asked me I guess. Hehe.
On 9/11 I was in home school at the time and I had woken up kind of early. My mom was usually home at this point in life as well because she didn't work in a day spa yet. She basically had her own clients in nursing homes and whatnot.
Anyway, I woke up and called her a couple times but she didn't answer. I had no clue what was going on yet, that anything had happened. I called her again and this time she answered. But she was bawling her eyes out. I asked her what was wrong like 3 times before she was able to say that she would be home in 2 minutes, for me to turn the TV on. So, I turned the TV on and all I saw was a plane crash into this tower. I didn't even know what the WTC was then. The news was saying what was going on but I couldn't really understand any of it. Maybe I was too shocked. I donno, I was 18 and it was just so out there. When my mom walked in, she explained what happened. At that point, I knew pretty much that NYC, that Washington, was in trouble. I began to cry not only for all the victims, but for R as well.
Sometimes I feel ashamed for that. Because he should've been the farthest thing from my mind at that point. But he'd been in NY for a while visiting and I didn't know where or how close he was you know? Later I found out he'd left that morning and was flying over Baltimore and they made that plane land in Baltimore because of the attacks.
I went upstairs and cried in my mom's bed, as did she, as we watched people in Pakistan celebrate America being attacked. Then we fell asleep. I can't believe it's been 6 years. I guess I was actually still 17 turning 18 that year now that I think about it...
Answering question #2:
My favorite kiss of all time was every time R and I kissed. The first time ever was on Easter. I was 17. It was like, 3 or 4 months after I'd met him. We'd spent pretty much all day talking and spending time with each other. He'd held me while I sang. Then he was telling me he thought my mom hated him and to please get him out of trouble. I never understood why he was so paranoid about that. He kept tipping my chair so I'd fall but he'd always catch me. Then just before I left to go home, he asked me for a good night kiss.
It was really sweet. Then someone walked by and said "get a room!" and R and I laughed then kissed again.
Then I went home...
The second time wasn't until 1 year later! Crazy huh? He was super drunk, and told me he loved me. I was helping him clean the bar. I was on the other side of the bar when he said those words.
"I love you, ya know that?" I never held it against him--even though I loved him too, I figured he was drunk so he didn't know what he was saying. I said "oh yea? Well, why don't you show me?" He was like, "I can't. You're all the way over there." So I walked over to him and I was saying something when he cupped/pinched my chin gently and just kissed me. There was another few times one was him saying he usually liked kissing older women but I kissed so much better.
I'm rolling my eyes at that now. There was also the time we made out on the hood of his car and he suddenly said "been a long 5 months huh?" I was so impressed that he knew that or cared enough to know that. But now I'm thinking B probably had mentioned it to him. I'm rolling my eyes over that too.
The last time we ever kissed turned into almost sex. I don't know why we didn't, but probably cuz we were on his apt. floor and my pregnant friend was in his bed.
Oh well. It wasn't meant to be. But I'd say the first 2 times I kissed R, 1 year apart--were my favorite of all time. Lol. K, I'm going to make myself lunch now.
<3,
me
Ew, I have to get ready for my garbage job soon. Really, like... my job is unethical at the very least. What incentive do they give me to make their sales goal for Estee Lauder or even Dillards for that matter? None. I don't make commission! The kicker is that if I worked for Estee Lauder at Macy's I would make commission. Plus hourly. But Macy's didn't hire me. Dillard's did. And now I find out that come June 26th (the day I started) on my 1 yr anniversary, if I didn't make my goal for the year, I get a hefty pay cut. And if I did I still do not get a raise. It's completely ridiculous. No incentive whatsoever. *sigh*.
Alright, more later. Gotta get ready for that garbage job.
<3 you.
3) My favorite memory of high school...hmmm. You know h/s was kind of a dark place for me. At first, I enjoyed being on color guard twirling those flags with the band and dancing was a lot of fun. As a freshman in h/s it was all I had really to look forward to. But then, sophomore year came around. And I dunno, I wasn't really interested in color guard anymore and I started going down my dark road. I was hanging out with "the freaks" trying to be somebody I wasn't. I cut classes, I tried speed, I was really... terrible. I was heavily influenced, trying to feel like for the first time I belonged somewhere.
At home, my brother was extremely abusive and I was hiding marks he'd given me except to certain "friends" who you'd think would have someone intervene. I considered experimenting bisexuality. But I never could figure out who to try it with that I trusted enough to keep a secret. "Friends" and I hung out at the movies (we didn't see any though) and in the parking lot of taco bell/Wendys.
I dated JD... then I dated this really weird guy named Dd...
--Okay, before I go on about him, I think I just stumbled upon something dealing with A. She just texted my phone.
"hey what's up?" it said
"gettin ready 4 work"
and now? Nothing. Now, usually D has the phone. And she KNOWS that. And I've noticed that when she DOES call, it's always when D has the phone. As well as texting. But when I text her/call, nothing.
Bitch can want my husband all she wants but she can't have him. How convenient for me that D left the phone at home. But now I'm a little suspicious.
Last week, or the week we met up with them (B/A) she texted: "do you know anyone that wants laser, I am closing out my month and hooking all of my friends up half off!" I don't see that D replied, so how did it come to be that she and D agreed on her coming over to see what he wanted lasered? Then it never happened to my knowledge. But who called who at that point? or if there was a text back, why was it deleted?
Grrrrrrr.
I'm gonna write about my ex D like I was, before I get all heated up over that two faced backstabbing hoe bag.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Like I said, Dd was weird. He was always talking about death and killing people. He kept failing 8th grade and putting JD down with insults. He was "in love" with me but we'd never kissed. I broke up with him because he creeped me out. None of my friends wanted me to do it though because they all thought he was sweet.
We continued to talk and whatnot, but he was stalking me--or said he was going to. He told me I was going to be trailer trash and marry a fat drunk. We'd have kids, and I'd see Dd on TV as a rock star and say "I used to date him!" Then my kids would be like "mom you dumb bitch, what did you dump him for?"
That really hurt.
Then he was drunk once and tried to grab me and slobber all over me so I slapped him b/c when I said no let go, he wouldn't. So he started dating Ti Dx and he had her call me and say if I ever slapped him again, he'd slap me back 10 times harder. And this was like, a long time after I'd left Atlantic High and went to homeschool. I'd stopped hanging out with that group so why were they bothering me now?
In homeschool, I spent a lot of time with Dl and Ma, going to movies, that sort of thing. I also spent mucho grande time at the tiki bar and with R. But I didn't do so well in homeschool. I figured I could slack off as much as I wanted. But I hated living the way I was--with my abusive brother, fighting with my mother. And the only comfort I found was in dance, R and Tiki bar, and having fun with Dl and Ma.
At Survivors, I focused a lot more on school. I enjoyed hanging out with Deja and of course, I met DS. I'd say that was my favorite memory of high school :).
D just walked in and I started talking about A and he interrupted by calling someone and telling me how his day was. Nice. Now he walks out and goes to the bedroom.
FUCK.
A you cunt licker.
I need to go to work.
<3 you!
P.s. I'm bringing this baby with me. I don't want D reading it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Well, I still have 1/2 hr before I have to be at work. I would've left at 3:30 to walk but D is here and driving wise, the mall is 5 min away so. I'm gonna start to answer:
4) 10 years ago I was 13, almost 14. I was in 7th grade. Early that year my best friend was Ed Jn, a Haitian girl I went to private school with. We really never hung out except at school. She was weird that way. --oh gotta go to work sorry--
Well, at work and as usual, no customers. I should work on my clienteling but I'm at the point where I don't have the motivation. So, back to my story.
Edn and I were both on the cheerleading squad. So that was our "fun" thing I guess you'd say. That and at recess we just talked about the people we went to school with. Funny, 3rd-5th grade Ed and I hated each other. Or at least I don't remember. I just always got her for secret santa and I hated it. For some reason in 6th grade we became friends. Best friends. I would venture to say it probably had something to do with the fact that we were both outcasts. She was the only black girl in our class and everyone made fun of her for it. I was "stupid" and lazy eyed so I was outcasted as well. I guess we found comfort in each other for that reason. When we became friends I stopped getting her for secret santa. It was weird.
Anyway, in 7th grade she and I were close. But then there was this one day I showed up in my cheerleading outfit because it was game day and it was standard procedure to wear our cheerleading uniforms. I guess that day, I hadn't gotten the memo that we weren't supposed to.
So all the girls on the team, which was really most of my class, made it hell for me. So w/e I tried to ignore it. Then Ed passed this note to me--unfinished no less. She said we couldn't be friends anymore.
At the same time, Ke, this girl--ugh. She goes "you know we weren't supposed to wear our uniforms today, ugh!" and I started crying mainly cuz of just everything. Ke goes "well you don't have to cry about it."
My mom brought me my school clothes but I ended up leaving for the day. That same day she decided to put me in public school. I'd had enough bullshit at private school.
I still to this day do not know why Ed couldn't be my friend anymore. Now, she's on my myspace lol. But we don't talk about what happened at Trinity.
At Carver, where I switched to, my best friend was the first girl that started talking to me. She was a short blonde haired (I mean her hair was short. Not her) girl -- tomboy--that loved soccer. We were instant friends. Sy had a way of just making me laugh no matter what. I later found out that she was orphaned at a young age and had lived in foster care nearly her entire life.
Her biological parents were both in jail. Her mother for drugs, and her father for sexually molestation and abuse--to Sy!
When I met her she lived with Marijola (Mary-ola) who was from Sweden I believe. And Lynn, her foster father. Their son had (Tristan) committed suicide so they wanted to adopt a child. They actually ended up divorcing because Lynn cheated on Marijola and she wasn't allowed to fully adopt Sy because the home life was now "unstable."
I also later found out that Lynn had also sexually molested Sy. After that, Sy lived with a new foster mom, Bb. Bb was nice. She gave Sy a birthday party.
But shortly after that, Sy was adopted by K and Danny Guthry. Danny didn't want kids, so him and Sy fought a lot. K wanted a daughter though so they adopted Sy, and moved her to Tallahassee.
K never liked me, she thought I was a bad influence on Sy. I suppose it's my fault that Sy had a baby at 18 and married the father of her baby the same year. *rolls eyes*
Anyway, it's been 2 years since I talked to Sy. I wonder what happened... :( 2 hours til I'm off. wheeee...
<3,
C
No comments:
Post a Comment