1:59am
Hey Chels,
Ugh holy fuck I am so exhausted right now. I don't even know how I'm awake right now. But I just have to write.
So, my day was great. More than great it was really freaking amazing. I only got a little sleep so I texted Joe for a while until it was time to go. So I get to Al's and tell him I got a table for us and I got a text from him telling me his car is screwed up. So I say that I don't mind picking him up and he agrees to that so I go over to his house to pick him up and we get to the restaurant and the table I got was still there lol. Even my water was still cold. So we chat and have a grand old time catching up. Then at like 3:30pm we get to the library to pick out some movies. We get back to my house and watch like 3 movies in a row. After the last one, I sit up and he grabs me so he has his arms around me and we are just laying there for a bit. Then I move to get a little more comfortable and he nuzzles my neck and then kisses it. Then after a while he is just kissing my neck until I turn my head and then we are kissing. And it was the sweetest kiss ever. It wasn't like Barry where it took him two hours to kiss me and then he goes for my boobs first thing, or Larry when he always tries to stick his hand down my pants every time he kisses me, or even James who asked me if I wanted to date him and then half an hour later we're getting naked. Joe was very respectful and he didn't even try and go for my boobs. It was nice to just kiss someone without all the theatrics, lol. I would have let him touch me, but I don't want to move too fast. But whatever happened between us felt right.
And then I almost killed him. I was driving to the pool hall where he wanted to be dropped off and there wasn't a parking lot or anything so I pulled over to the side a bit. And then I saw that a car was coming and in an instant I stepped on the gas not realizing he wasn't out of the car completely yet. But he said it was okay and he just sort of rolled out of the car which didn't really make me feel better. I just wish I didn't get spooked, lol. But... You can't go back in time, apparently.
Anyhow... I still dunno how to digest all of this. Like... I like that we are talking and he's in my life again. And I am even curious to see if it really goes anywhere. But at the same time, I still have no idea what he was thinking at the time. Like... Just out of the blue talk to me again. But we did sort of have a conversation about that already. He just said he needed to have sober friends and he was going off his meds because he's sick of feeling cloudy all the time so he thought of me as someone he could talk to. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad he thought of me. And I don't think he'd be the type to pull what Ryan pulled on me. I just don't all the way trust the situation. What is Mike gonna do when he finds out Joe and I have been talking and hanging out and apparently kissing, lol.? I hope mike can be civil. But when it comes to me, who the fuck knows what is going to tumble out of his mouth.
2:25am
No comments:
Post a Comment