Sunday, June 8, 2014

September 8th, 2008

September 8th, 2008
12:25pm

Hello...
I need help.  I need to stay away from my cell phone.  Like... I understand that people have lives and whatnot, but it upsets me when certain people don't answer me back or just say a couple things.  Like Ryan... I guess I miss hearing from him every day but in a way it's good.  Thing is... he seems to say "if things were different" but I know in my heart I would not have been happy with him.  I'm glad he liked me and we got along but... I would have just gotten out of one relationship just to jump into another one.  And the point of me getting out of a relationship is that I want to stay single for a while. Not to mention Chelsea would have a heart attack.  That would be the ultimate slap in the face.  It's enough for me that we got to hang out a few times.  And I feel like if I hadn't planned on leaving, it would have taken a lot longer to get that far.  I think I sped it up cuz I was leaving.  And I think part of the reason why he "couldn't help himself" is because I was leaving so he wanted to not waste the moment or whatever.  But now... I lose out on a friend because he has more than platonic feelings for me. This is nothing new for me.  I always get into trouble with guys.  I guess because this stuff happens... or at least has the potential of happening.

And then Mike... he asks me to send him a pic and my phone was being stupid so I sent it the next day and that was it.  I haven't heard from him since.  But from experience I know that he's busy and probably also giving me space {no, he's just an asshole.  11/3/2013}.  So... I don't want to sit around waiting for guys to text me.  So I just need a break from my phone.  I just need one day or 2 days away from my phone, just peace and quiet.  And I did clear off the piano so I could play. And it's fun.  But I need to concentrate on it more.

12:49pm

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