11:01am
I love when the kitchen smells like eggs and bacon!! Ok, well I love when it smells like good food cooking or baking. lol. Ew, except frying fish. That smell has always made me sick. In my dream last night, it was nuts! Nuts I tell you. In fact it was so nuts I can’t even really tell you what happened because I’m not sure! I know I was being chased by some guy, but I don’t know why? And I kept trying to throw him off by shoving him stuff, like tape he could use if he rewound all the film. While he was looking at it, I ran for the truck, but he ran after me and got in the truck with me. I tried twice to get it to run before I realized it was already running. So, then I kept crashing the truck, I just couldn’t control it--and I was crying. Then David and I were running together down winding purple stairs. We did something wrong and didn’t want to get caught so we were hurrying. So we got away and he had his arm around me. His hair was longer, in a ponytail and brown. We walked by some children’s library in the day, and when we passed, it was night. He asked me for a rag or something to use the bathroom and like, wiped it on me! Ewww! And that’s all I remember. =/ Ok, it’s 3:19pm now. I get so annoyed when plans get thwarted. I’m trying not to be so annoyed with my dad because I know I’ll miss him when he’s gone. =(.
Last night was interesting… Justin and I went to Bru’s room. Nicole was supposed to go, but she was sick so it was only Justin and I. I was telling him about a dream I had as we walked in. When we were inside, he looked at me funny and said, “Uh, Erin’s here. We walked right past her.” I just said “oh well.” Lol. So we sat at the bar and I watched Athena and Erin through a window as they got up and walked inside. I didn’t really feel anything--not even nervous. They hugged Justin and then me. I was surprised. Very. We exchanged pleasantries and then she says “I’m still a little angry over everything but I’m ready to…” and I don’t know if I just tuned her out or honestly couldn’t hear. She says I have no idea what she went through that night. She had a knife to her wrist. I was like, “And you have no idea what I was going through, either.” And it was like that was it. So really nothing has changed. I mean we all sat together the rest of the night, and whatever she was going to come over and see my bathroom but I went to bed instead. I can be around her I guess, like last night, but I don’t want to be like we were before. I feel like no one gets how fuckin’ free and positive I’ve felt since not being friends with her… AND Melissa. I don’t want to get sucked back up in that hole again. But no one else seems to see the effects. Ugh maybe cuz I stopped going out. but I felt like going out meant going to all the places Erin went and I just wanted to be happy and avoid drama. Blah. Enough of that.
<3,
star
12:26am
(10-13-10)
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Fuck I am so hot. My dad turned AC off so we could open windows and enjoy the weather. But if there’s no breeze, it does no fucking good. God damn you Hulu--I’m missing everything because my Adobe flash plug-in keeps crashing. I need a new computer. Tomorrow, Comcast is coming to hook up TV. Eww Comcast. But yay TV! I’m also calling TMS and Eyeglass World. So hopefully I am closer to a new job and I’ll be getting my new glasses tomorrow. I hope I can get my permit Thursday somehow, if not, I will have to wait till Tuesday next week because idk if DMV is open Saturday. I guess we’ll see. I also have plans to make videos tomorrow. I’m sorry the end of this is moving more slow. I’m gonna hit the hay. Nighty nighterz, don’t let the bed bugs biterz!
love you!
<3,
star
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